Crowdarnaque

On dit souvent « là où il y a de la gène, il n’y a pas de plaisir ! » Il faut croire que chez Universal on applique ce précepte à la règle. Du coup, c’est non sans honte que le label en appelle aux internautes pour financer la réimpression de vinyles de Nirvana, Sonic Youth, Björk, Pulp et d’autres issus de leur catalogue.
Rappelons que les ventes de vinyles n’ont jamais été aussi hautes depuis 1997 ! Derrière, le label compte vous remercier avec un téléchargement numérique (tout l’inverse du vinyle quoi) et des visuels personnalisés.
Nan mais on s’en branle, stop la connerie là, non ?
[i]dear daily mail,
it has come to my recent attention
that me recent appearance at glastonbury festivals kindly received a mention
i was doing a number of things on that stage up to and including singing songs (like you do…)
but you chose to ignore that and instead you published a feature review of my boob

dear daily mail,
there’s a thing called a search engine: use it!
if you’d googled my tits in advance you’d have found that your photos are hardly exclusive
in addition you state that my breast had escaped from my bra like a thief on the run
you do you know that it wasn’t attempting to just take in the RARE british sun?

dear daily mail,
it’s so sad what you tabloids are doing
your focus on debasing women’s appearances ruins our species of humans
but a rag is a rag and far be it from me to go censoring anyone OH NO
it appears that my entire body is currently trying to escape this kimono….

dear daily mail,
you misogynist pile of twats
i’m tired of these baby bumps, vadge flashes, muffintops
where are the newsworthy COCKS?
if iggy or jagger or bowie go topless the news barely causes a ripple
blah blah blah feminist blah blah blah gender shit blah blah blah
OH MY GOD NIPPLE

dear daily mail,
you will never write about this night
i know that because i’ve addressed you directly i’ve made myself no fun to fight
but thanks to the internet people all over the world can enjoy this discourse
and commune with a roomful of people in london who aren’t drinking kool-aid like yours

and though there be millions of people who’ll accept the cultural bar where you have it at
there are plenty of others who’re perfectly willing to see breasts in their natural habitat

i keenly anticipate your highly literate coverage of upcoming tours

dear daily mail,
UP YOURS.

……………

a fun note: a magician never reveals their secrets, but i’m a musician, and happy to reveal mine.
the start of the melody / the waltz was a DIRECT rip from the “waltz for eva and che” from EVITA.
weber and rice, sue me…it’ll make this even more interesting.
(but seriously, i love evita, this record was one of my fucking favorites growing up.)

love
AFP[/i]